Starting... Pausing....

Well, today was the official start of school, and I think I'm off to a good start: almost done with the reading for one class. LOL, hopefully I'll be able to get it all done. For some reason, I feel so unprepared for this term. Maybe its because SO many things are going on while in class, that I don't feel I'll have the time. Hopefully that is not the case though.

I also need to thank a few friends for always being there to listen. My heart has been very heavy lately, and being able to talk it out helps relieve the stress at least for a little while. so... THANKS!!
That is all for now..

Breathe in... and let it out

Sometimes it just feels better to take a sigh, and let it all out...

there are just those times when nothing helps except to cry or sigh, or laugh, or whatever... its such a simple solution, but yet it lifts an unbelievable about of pressure off a person. I wish there was more that a person could do to help certain situations, but all in all, there's only one that can help all situations, and that is God. It gets hard sometimes to hand over the steering wheel, to let him take you where you need to go, but it must be done.

This week is starting with a sigh, and hopefully, God will understand my fears, but will help me hand over the steering wheel and will take me where he needs me to go.

new week

Well, my weekend was pretty uneventful. Josh and I took our 1 year anniversary pictures, which turned out great! other than that I pretty much sat around and played on facebook, and watched tv and napped lol. I am hoping that soon some friends of mine will hear the prayers that have been said for them. They are going through a difficult time, and it is so difficult for me to not be able to make the situation better, or to go away... its really hard because I've also seen their relationship from its early stages to now... I just hope that the good in the situation will become visible soon. But here is to a new week, a new day, a new beginning.

**sigh**

So, I've been feeling kind of down lately.. I'm sure it is just my hormones, but none the less, it is real... so here it goes haha!

So, a lady at josh's work "quit" about two weeks ago and now it has come up to where he would be able to take the overnight shift. He loves this shift, but it would mean that for the time being, we would not really see each other, since I work second shift at my job. This move comes kind of as a blessing in disguise because in the fall josh is wanting to take classes, and if he has to do clinical hours, it would be easier to work around an overnight shift, and, after the baby is born, I am able to change my schedule more frequently than he is. But it still feels like we are just being rushed into having to make this decision... hell we don't even know how we're going to survive after the next 4.5 months!!!! Oh well... I guess if we need to change something, we can change it... seeing a place that we don't have to pay so much in rent, and would be able to catch up on debt, are really looking nice now.. but we wouldn't be in our "own place". which is the only reason I am still doubtful to go there... UGHH!!! I hate this part of being a grown up... such an exciting part of our lives is coming up, and here I am worried about a schedule change... and bills, and our baby... etc. etc. etc... nature of the beast i suppose.

Change is Inevitable, Except from a Vending Machine

So, it seems that this time of year is one of change for many this year. I hope that all turns out the way it is supposed to. With God, nothing is impossible, And with God in the driver's seat.. you know he will take you where you need to be. But change is hard, but inevitable. But if this is the case, why is it so hard to handle? why are we so bogged down in our day to day, that change is such a scary thing? Josh and I are going through our own changes.. we're becoming parents. A constant thought in my head is are we good enough, will we make due with what we have...will we be able to survive? I mean... this is a LIFE we're talking about!!! HOLY COW!!!!!!!!! What did we get ourselves into??? but above all else, THIS is what I've been wanting to do my whole life.. to bring a life into this world, and nurture it into a wonderful person, that does right, and good by others and by God.

Change is good. It keeps us on our toes, and it lets us see what exactly we are capable of. You don't know your limit until you try to overcome it. Just because change is happening, doesn't mean that the past can't still be there, it just means that it has done its part in shaping who you are, and you move on, move forward from where you are.

I'm going to try my best at moving forward this week... trying to let things go that have been bothering me.. and to put my life in the direction I would like to see it go.

New Beginnings

So... I think I'm going to start this a brand new thing... Something to focus on. Hopefully I'll be able to keep up with it. So here's the beginning.

I'm a married woman, to a wonderful man, and we are expecting our first child on this Halloween. I'm in school for criminal justice, and after that, I'll be going for social psychology. I don't know what I want to do with my life yet.. just want to finish school, be the best mom I know I can be, and be a good wife to my loving husband.

My husband will be going to school for his EMT certification, and hopefully that will open many doors for us.

I am a practicing Christian, and I know that my journey is still a long one. I am always trying to improve my life, and how I live it. I hope that my closest friends see how big my heart is, and how much love I have to give.

For now, I think that is all... More to come soon.

K